How to Talk so Teens will Listen & Listen so Teens will Talk - My Notes on a Book

A few years ago I had the most amazing task at my job as clinical lead at a psychology centre for young people. I had a large budget to spend on clinical resources for my workplace. Buying books is one of my favourite pastimes. Along with a lengthy list of books I loved and was eager to get my hands on, I also enlisted the help of my colleagues and friends to broaden the list. My colleague, Caitlin recommended How to Talk So Teens Will Listen & Listen so Teens Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish. On the list, it went. The books, DVDs and games arrived and I felt like it was Christmas in June. I started making my way through the books as fast as I could. This one just sat on the shelf. 

Months later I sought advice from Caitlin about a challenge I was having within my therapy sessions with a mother and her 13 year old daughter. She mentioned some helpful strategies from this book so I took it home for a read. I couldn’t put it down. It was simple, straightforward and engaging. Adele and Elaine used examples from their own lives as well as stories from parents that they had worked with over the years. This strategy-focused book is written as if a story. From the beginning, the reader is taken along for a ride through several weeks of a parenting group that the authors facilitated. They get to learn from the struggles and strategies that these parents implement. The strategies are depicted in cartoon examples throughout the book which makes it even more engaging and easy to grasp.

This book reignited my excitement in working with parents. Even more so, it had me questioning why all self-help or psychology books weren’t written in such an appealing and accessible manner. Parents also take quickly to this book for all the same reasons I have outlined above. For people reading this who may not be parents nor interested in parenting strategies, this book can still be very useful. The strategies discussed can be applied to most relationships. They will help to open up communication and reduce arguments. Practicing these ideas within your relationships will help you to be a more present and engaged listener. Others will feel heard and understood by you too. Really it could almost be titled How to Talk so Anyone will Listen & Listen so Anyone will Talk. The authors have two similar books for parents of younger children, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk and How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7 

Grab a copy of How to Talk so Teens will Listen. 

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